Saying Goodbye to Corporate Employment, Gardening, and Tuesday Tutorials.

Let’s talk being intentional and learning when to walk away.

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A LOT has been happening around here at Farmhouse on Five Mile. A lot of decisions have been made and a lot more to make still. I thought I’d jump on here to update you all thus far.

First, I want to talk about the doormat project that I was supposed to share about a month ago. I wanted to start using #TuesdayTutorials and share fun, simple, DIY projects on the blog. I even wanted to open up guest bloggers to share their projects here! While I am still open for guests to share their DIY tutorials, I had to reevaluate my own desire to pursue this idea. Do you ever question your motives from time to time? Do you ever pose yourself the question, “Am I pursuing this because it truly brings me joy, or because I think that’s what the world will think I’m supposed to do?” It sounds silly coming out like that but you should try it sometime. In fact, you should really start asking yourself this question in everything you do. Are you living the busy, hustle lifestyle because you truly thrive in that way of living or because that’s the world’s expectation that you have placed upon yourself? Do you really love doing DIY projects?? Or, are you like me, where you like the idea of them (and even love pinning them on your Pinterest board) but the thought of going the physical, mental and financial process is absolutely draining. Well, the latter is definitely where I’m at. I’ve realized that I only wanted to start DIY tutorial blog posts on here because I set an unrealistic and worldly expectation upon myself. I started a “Farmhouse Blog,” so that’s what I’m supposed to do….isn’t it? Follow in Joanna Gaines’ footsteps??  Isn’t that pretty much what everyone wants to read about?

No, I don’t have to do that.

In fact, that’s not what my Farmhouse blog is here for.

This is a Farmhouse, lifestyle, Christ-following, simplistic searching blog. This is where I share our adventures, our animals and our projects.  It doesn’t mean that I have to force myself to fall in love with “Doing It Myself” all the time. I do love simple projects and it doesn’t mean I won’t ever do a DIY again in my life, but I certainly don’t having a set expectation of what the end result should look like or the expectation I’ve placed on myself that all of my talent and energy has to go into doing projects in order to create something worthwhile in the blogging community. It’s simply not true. I should only pursue those things under the conditions of 1) I actually have the time for it and 2) the process truly brings me joy. Well, #2 is not necessarily true at the moment.

In this revelation, I’ve discovered what brings me even more joy than completing a DIY project: ordering said projects or items from local, small businesses and friends who are talented enough to create said them for me! There is a wonderful satisfaction that comes with supporting someone’s lively-hood and being able to appreciate their talents by purchasing from them. It gives me far more satisfaction through the fact that I can be intentional in supporting in that way instead of draining myself just to get a glimpse of sweat satisfaction. Being intentional in how you spend your time and money does not equate to draining yourself.  So, if something is draining you, whether physically or mentally, take the time to first recognize that it is. Second, evaluate why you’re doing it. Set aside what you think you should be doing and start pursuing tasks, hobbies, a career, and a general lifestyle that brings you joy and brings out the very best in you. That, to me, is being intentional. That’s a mindset worth pursuing.

With that said, we’ve also made the decision to discontinue our vegetable garden for the year. We barely even got it started to begin with. Not much planning and execution came with seed starting, planting or keeping weeds away. I had to take a day or so to apply the same concept of being intentional to our gardening. We have a Farmhouse…a farm even! We’re supposed to have a garden!!!! It’s a must!

No, it is not.

Not if you can’t even keep up with cutting your grass on time.

Not when your mind isn’t fully there to be focused on it.

So, we simply decided that this isn’t our year for a garden. My mind is running a million miles a minute in another direction and staying on top of gardening is only hindering and reminding me that I’m failing at it. I don’t need any added self-detrimental thoughts to weigh me down. Plus, there’s an upside to this decision. It’s farmer’s market season!!! I can enjoy fresh, local produce without having to sweat for it and while supporting neighbors in the process. That sounds pretty intentional to me! Now, all of this does not mean that we won’t ever pursue a garden again. I LOVE gardening and it does bring me true joy. But sometimes you need to take a break from even the things you love when your heart isn’t leaving enough room for it. Giving this up for now only means that gardening in the future will be that much more enjoyable and intentional with planning. I’ll be able to come at it with better ideas and better  execution.

One last update for you all if you’ve made it this far: I am leaving my corporate job. I’ve been working in Corporate America for the last seven years and I’m finally laying it to rest. I don’t have much to add to that other than this: it’s bittersweet, I will miss the people (maybe not the job itself but definitely will miss the relationships I’ve formed), and I am only looking ahead now. For now, I will try to focus on giving horse lessons and see where God leads me in my life. This is the most uncertain I’ve ever been when it comes to the direction I’m headed for and I am learning to lean heavily on Him.

I think that is definitely His…..intention.

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